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Out of the Humidor

CA Readers
From the Print Edition:
Rush Limbaugh, Spring 94

(continued from page 3)

"Just two," he now pleads. "You won't be sorry."

How can I turn down this famous former New York Times reporter, a golfing partner of General Eisenhower and confidant of the current president? Easy, I think--but what the hell!

Bill grabs the two cigars, clutching them in his hand as if he were running the last leg of an Olympic mile relay and disappears in the direction of Pierre Salinger's office (the president's press secretary).

Lawrence reappears about 15 minutes later with a big grin on his beefy face.

"OK, you son of a bitch," I say, "how'd Salinger like 'em? I hope they did you some good."

"Oh, Pierre liked his fine, but the president is really enjoying his!"

"You're too much, Lawrence. You mean to tell me the whole world may go to war any minute over the Cuban situation, depending on whatever decision Kennedy makes, and the president is in there now smoking one of my contraband Cuban cigars?"

"Why not?" he answers.

Why not, indeed. After all, what better way for the president to relax his nerves and do some serious thinking than with a fine Havana cigar? I fantasize--the irony of it--that JFK makes the right decision because one of Castro's cigars, which I have supplied him, puts him in the right frame of mind and helps save the world from nuclear destruction.

"Har-r-rumph!" goes Lawrence.


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